


Blinded

by Kunoichirin



Category: Naruto
Genre: M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV First Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-30
Updated: 2019-08-17
Packaged: 2020-07-25 17:36:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,476
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20029699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kunoichirin/pseuds/Kunoichirin
Summary: A lightning strike. Directly in front of him. The explosion only reached his ears after the ear-piercing shriek from Ino. He couldn't open his eyes... or... were they open?





	1. Lightning Strike

**Author's Note:**

> So... had this stuck in my head for... a long time... and yes, I know, I haven't written in a while. Well, life does that sometimes. It sucks. But, I think this fic might actually be worth it. Iiiiin my opinion. Heh.

We were fine. We had found a cave to take refuge in to get away from the storm. And everything was _fine_.

Until _they_ came. The storm had shown no sign of letting up anytime soon, but I told Ino we would be alright if we stayed on the ground, under the cover of the trees. I thought we would be. This... possibility had never crossed my mind. I had thought we were safe. And then...

Extreme pain struck me in the back. I cried out, but forced myself to stay on my feet. Ino shrieked, but not for the same reason. Ninja surrounded us armed with swords, naginatas, kunai, and shurikens. I pulled the kunai out of my back, gritting my teeth as the freezing rain pattered against the wound. I squinted to see their headbands. The didn't have them.

Me and Ino went back to back, keeping a close eye on any movement to happen. I quickly pulled myself together and quickly calculated every possible move, even the possibility one or two or many others could be above us. I could rule nothing out. Just to be safe.

They all attacked at once. Including some from above. And the battle began. We were heavily outnumbered, but with our skill, I was sure we could pull through.

I had never been so wrong in my entire life.

They didn't give me anytime to set aside my weapons and use my shadow jutsu, not even shadow possession. He couldn't focus, only react. Every move they made led me deeper into helplessness. Ino was fighting beside me, but she too couldn't fight them off. Between the two of us, we had only taken out one or two of them. They were too damn strong.

"Shikamaru!" Ino shrieked. I whipped around, seeing several of them carrying her off. My mind immediately turned to panic mode and I could no longer think straight. All of the ninja were beginning to chase after their allies. I threw myself forward, running after them. I couldn't let them kidnap Ino. There was no telling what they'd do.

I was forced to stop. Pain, unbelievable, stinging pain struck my side. I looked down. Through my side was the blade of a sword. I grit my teeth, and grabbed the blade with my hand. It hurt, but the ninja couldn't get loose. I kicked my leg up and smacked the ninja's hand off the handle, then pushed the blade out myself, and threw it. 

I guided it with my shadow manipulation, straight through one of the ninja. The ninja beside me attacked me one on one. I was losing blood from every cut, every stab wound that I had received during the battle. But I remained strong.

I fought back, hand to hand, head to head, and won.

My eyes shot ahead immediately, and I began to run. Run after them. _Ino... hold on!_ I refused to lose another friend after losing Asuma.

_Krakow!_

A blinding flash of lightning appeared directly in front of me from the sky. Ino's scream of my name reached my ears right before the explosion did. I was sent flying back, my consciousness disappearing altogether.

_Ino... no... _no_..._

_~_

I could hear. That was for certain. I heard footsteps, pawsteps, and I could... feel them. I could feel them through the ground. But... I couldn't move. My eyes remained shut. I was only barely conscious. 

Pain. That was the next thing that registered in my brain. I was lying in a pool of blood. My _own_ blood. I was too weak to speak, to make any noise. I felt flaming pain. I felt as though I had been torched.

_Because I was._ I remembered thinking about the lightning strike. _Wait... where's Ino!?_ She had been kidnapped. Because I had failed to protect her. I felt the hot, silent tears begin to fall.

I heard the bark of a dog. It was a familiar bark.

"What is it, Akamaru?" Him. Of course. It _had_ to be him. I'd recognize that voice anywhere. Kiba, a fellow Chuunin, and a complete knucklehead. "What the- blood?!" I heard the rustling of leaves beside me. "Sh-Shika...maru?!"

I still couldn't move. My brain was functioning, but my body wouldn't- couldn't. Akamaru whimpered. Pain seared through me as he nudged me with his nose. My body tensed.

"Akamaru, don't touch him, he's- oh my gods, is he even alive?!" I could only sense how close he was. I could feel something against my chest, and my body twitched. "We have to get him back to the village, ASAP!!" The pain returned, sharper than before, as arms lifted me into their strong hold. One arm behind my back, the other on the inside of my knees. Effective, but uncomfortable in every way for me.

We were far from the village, about a day's worth of travel, and I couldn't help but wonder what Kiba was doing so far out. _He should at least wrap up my worst wounds so I won't bleed out, that idiot._

I could tell we were moving, from the vibrations going through Kiba as his feet pounded against the earth. His breath came out rapidly, as though he was terrified. And I can't blame him. I am too.

_Kiba... why are you so scared? I should be dead. You should just leave me here._ If I could say that out loud, I'm pretty sure I know exactly what he would say to me. _"What, did you leave_ me_ when I almost died on the Sasuke recovery mission? Hell no, so I'm not leaving you either.__"_

I shifted, just slightly, so I could lean into the Inuzuka. His heartbeat was as rapid as his breathing, which worried me. It also slightly frustrated me, but I didn't know why. 

Kiba pulled me a bit closer to him in return, as if to assure me that he was here. It encouraged a wave of affection for Kiba to wash through me. I mentally shook it off. 

My pain was worse than physical when I thought of Ino. _She was kidnapped... because I couldn't protect her. I always thought of her as another troublesome girl, and she still is... but she was- is my friend. But... do I really deserve to call her my friend? Or anyone, for that matter? One way or another, I _always_ let them down. I guess... I'm just terrible luck. And it affects everyone I care about. I'm amazed nothing terrible happened to my parents relating to me. Oh wait. _I_ happened to them._

I grit my teeth and let another tear fall. Kiba tenses against me.

"Shikamaru..." He muttered. "Hang in there for me, will ya?"

_No, Kiba._ I think bitterly. _I can't- _do_ anything. I'm useless. I'm helpless, I'm worthless, awful, good-for-nothing, cold-hard-bad-luck. Why won't you just let me die? It'd save everyone a lot of trouble. For all my life I've called people troublesome, and bothersome. But I guess, really, that's just what _I_ am to everyone._

I'm too weak to even really cry then. All I can muster is another, meaningless, tear. My eyes sting now, too. I'm just adding to my own pain. What a drag.

Akamaru whimpers again. Kiba grunts, sounding frustrated. "I can sense it too, Akamaru. He's in pain, I know. But what can _I_ do? The best I can do is get him back to the village, where he'll be healed, and everything will be fine. Everything, will be, fine." He took a deep breath. It sounded like he was reassuring himself, too. I frown, and sigh.

I counted the minutes in my head as Kiba ran with me in his arms. The only sounds I could hear were Kiba's feet hitting the ground, Akamaru's pawsteps, and Kiba's breath, as it came in and out, steadying out gradually. Occasionally, Kiba would mutter something to reassure himself, or to speak to Akamaru.

"We're almost there... just a few hours away... just a few hours, and we'll have you safe and sound." He whispered to me. Another wave of affection crackled through me, and the corners of my mouth twitched, wanting to smile to him.

I still wasn't fully conscious whatsoever, just enough that I could think and listen.

I could tell it was early morning by the cheerful chirps of some birds. Had we been traveling all night? How was Kiba still running, not even taking a break once? I could tell he was exhausted, as he was panting heavily, but his pace never faltered. Akamaru whined quietly for a bit.

"I... know..." Kiba wheezed. "I'm tired... too... but... we can't... take a break... until, Shikamaru... is safe." _Stop making me feel affection towards you, you stupid canine._ I glowered to myself.

I still couldn't get myself to wake up. My eyes wouldn't open. I couldn't _make_ them open. I was beginning to feel lightheaded, and knew I would probably pass out again. I had been kind of on and off during the whole thing, so perhaps it'd be for the best if I were unconscious.

Only now did I realize how cold I was due to the storm. _When had it let up, anyway? Before I woke up, I know, but... if Kiba isn't soaked, then perhaps much before. But, now that I think about it, how long was I even _out_?_

I must have nodded off again, because before I know it, I hear the noise of daily life in the village.

"Good morning Kiba-"

"Sorry, Kotetsu-sama, no time to talk!" Kiba cut him off quickly.

"Eh? Wait, what are you- _who _are you carrying?!" Izumo exclaimed.

"I'll explain everything to Lady Sixth later!" Kiba called back, running off. I'm guessing he's running towards the hospital, because he's still panting, and muttering something about Sakura. "You're going to be okay, Shikamaru. Just hold on a little longer..."

I feel myself begin to shut down once again. I've lost so much blood. _Because _some_ idiot didn't think to wrap up my wound..._

~

I'm awake at last, and I finally feel refreshed and safe. Finally, I can open my eyes-

...

My eyes are open... right? Then why was it pitch black? Everything was so dark... the safe feeling disappeared. I could feel my eyelids moving as I blink. I'm not dreaming... I'm awake... then why...?

And then it struck me. Just like the lightning had.

I heard the door open as I attempt to sit up. "Shikamaru! You're awake! Good. I steadied your blood flow, and your wounds are shut. You'll be out of here in a few days." Sakura... she sounded so cheerful and relieved.

"S-Sakura..." I stammer, my voice starting to crack as realization dawns on me. 

"Hm?" I hear footsteps begin to walk towards me.

"Sakura..." I say again, the crack in my voice leading to the hot tears beginning to form. "Everything... I'm..."

"Shikamaru?"

"I'm blind."


	2. Determination

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shikamaru has been relieved of all ninja duties. Broken with this news, he isn't sure how to tell everyone. When he gets a brilliant idea, he is determined to carry it out, no matter what anyone else says.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got this chapter title because I was a bit lazy, and I was listening to Determination from Octopath Traveler (you should too, it's beautiful), and it fits so well. Y'know, as Shikamaru/Kiba is my OTP, I decided to make this mean something special. Hell, this won't be my last ShikaKiba, mind you, but I thought to do something inspiring. I'm just that kind of guy.

"Shikamaru Nara." Tsunade said quietly, her voice shaking. "As much as this hurts me to say, I am relieving you of your ninja duties. With your... condition, I'm afraid I have no other choice." She muttered something I could barely hear: "Please prove me wrong."

I couldn't speak. It was too much of a shock. If I spoke, I would cry, and I was _not_ about to cry in front of the Hokage. So I simply kept a straight face. I couldn't help but whisper; "Is there some way to fix my eyes?"

Tsunade hesitated. "I... I'll see what I can find. If I can find anyway of helping you, I will." I nodded in thanks, choking back my tears. "You may go." I stood, and thought for a moment. 

As I knew Tsunade was right in front of me, that meant that the door was straight behind me. I turned and carefully left, making sure I didn't run into the doorway on the way out. I knew the whole village like the back of my hand, I knew the layout of this building, and my house perfectly. I wanted to be fine, all I could think about was training. _Training? Training for what? Now I'm even more helpless than I ever imagined I'd ever be..._

I stayed close to the wall and felt along it for the way to the stairs. _Stairs? That's a terrible idea._ I thought to myself, but dismissed it without a second thought.

I found the stairs easily, and guided myself to the stairs. Taking a gentle hold of the railing (after a bit of trying to find it), I took careful steps down the stairs. I found myself counting the steps I took, all the way to the bottom. I felt along the wall again, and got myself out the door. I felt so exposed suddenly, unable to see where anything was, unable to find my way around.

Leaning against the side of the building for a bit, I tried to picture and remember my way around. My mind easily wandered, and I begun to think of Chouji. Chouji, who's mentor was killed, whose teammates are either MIA or blind. He was alone. Ino-Shika-Cho was now just... Cho. I suddenly felt even worse. I felt alone. I felt sick in a sort. Ino's gone, I'm blind, Asuma's dead, and Chouji's alone. Fantastic.

I shoved those thoughts away, and tried to focus on the layout of the village. If I could just remember... maybe I wouldn't be so useless. I felt the small tears rolling down my cheeks before I knew they were there. Maybe I should just die.

"Hey!! Shikamaru!!" I froze. I would recognize that annoying voice anywhere. Naruto, only one of our age still a Gennin. Though, he's proven himself to be more than that, just not officially. I heard his footsteps coming fast, and I could feel the slight vibrations in ground. "How's it going? I heard you got back from a mission yesterday!"

I flinched, and lowered my head. "Yeah, the mission that we didn't even come close to finishing, and to make matters worse, probably my last mission ever." I growled bitterly, my voice beginning to crack.

"Eh? What're you talking about, Shikamaru?" Naruto asked, oblivious. I turned my head towards where the sound of his voice was coming from. "Are you crying?"

"No, I just got dust in my eyes- yes, I'm crying!" I snapped. I could mentally see him flinch. I cleared my throat and steadied my tone. "I'm blind, Naruto."

"WHAAAAAAAAT!?!" Naruto exclaimed, hurting my ears. "You're BLIND!?

"Thanks Naruto, for exaggerating a moment where I'm simply trying to inform you of something." I sigh, turning my head back. 

"HOW!?"

"I'll tell you, if you'll stop screaming." I say sharply.

"Oh, sorry, sorry." He apologized, then cleared his throat. "How?

"Lightning strike. Remember that storm that happened some days ago?" I ask.

"Holy shit." He breathed, probably shocked.

I close my eyes, though it makes no difference to me. "It's like being blindfolded."

"Huh." Naruto thought for a moment. "Do you need help getting back to your place?" He offered.

"Ye-" I pause for a moment to think. "Actually, could you help me find Kiba's house?"

Naruto didn't say anything for a moment. "Sure, why?"

"Well, he's the one that brought me back to the village. I would've died of my wounds if he hadn't found me." I explained. That was only half the truth, however. Really, I had an idea. An idea I believe only Kiba could help me with.

So Naruto stood beside me, and begun walking. Through the vibrations in the ground, I followed. We walked in silence, which was unusual for Naruto, as he was normally so lively.

"Is something wrong?" I asked.

"..." Naruto let out a small sigh. "It's just- hard to take in, y'know? I mean, you're a super promising ninja, and had- have a lot of potential. But... now?"

"I know. It was hard for me too." I agreed, my voice cracking a bit at the end. I cleared cleared throat. "Especially because... because..." I trailed off, thinking of Ino.

"Hm?" Naruto nudged me. "Because what?"

"Because I couldn't save Ino, and I'll never get the chance to!" I snapped, then cleared my throat, forcing myself not to cry. "She was... kidnapped. I tried to get her back- I fought, _so_ _hard_. But I was useless in the end. And now, I can't even make it up to her."

"Ino's been WHAT!?" Naruto exclaimed. "Did you tell Granny Tsunade about that?!"

"Granny- no... I... actually completely forgot to." I say, then immediately turn around. "I should go do that."

"Don't worry about it Shikamaru." I whip around, hearing heavier footsteps. "I'll tell her."

"Chou...ji?" I guess, hoping to be correct.

"Yep. I'll... tell her for you... what's up with your eyes?" Chouji asked. I flinch, reluctant to tell him.

"Itsnotimportantbye." I quickly hurry ahead, walking fast.

"Hey, wait up!" Naruto called, running after me. "Don't forget that I'm helping you!"

"Right..." I sigh. "Lead on."

I follow his footsteps through streets and over a small bridge or two, until finally stopping. "Alright, here we are. See you later." And he walked off. I took a deep breath, and put my hand on the door to see where it was.

I knocked.

I heard the door open.

"Shikamaru!" Kiba cried, both of surprise and relief, and embraced me. I winced at his tight bear hug.

"Yup, it's me. Please let go now." I choke out.

"Oh, sorry, sorry sorry." Kiba apologized. "So, what brings you here?"

"You." I say bluntly. "I wanted to thank you for bringing me back to the village... but if it's alright... I need your help with something."

"Sure, what is it?" Kiba asked.

"First thing you need to know, is that I was struck by lightning, and am now blind." I say calmly. I can only sense how stiff the air has become. 

"Wh-what?" Kiba whispered. "No... _no_, you _can't_ be..."

I reach out to put a hand on his shoulder. I make contact with his chest, and quickly move it to his shoulder, my face heating a bit with embarrassment. "I am. The second thing you need to know, is that all my other senses have heightened. I can feel even the slightest vibrations in the ground, I can hear and smell better than before." Kiba poked me in the side and I gave a surprised yelp, and swatted his hand away.

"You've become more sensitive, too." He laughed. I narrowed my eyes.

"The point is, I think you can help me take advantage of this, and help me prove that I'm not useless, even if I'm blind." I say, a bit of plead in my voice.

Kiba's silent for a moment. "I don't think I can do that. I mean, I can, but... I don't... want to risk you hurting yourself like this again, or worse."

I slump a bit. "I see." I said. I heard him turn around, and grinned a bit.

It sounded like he only walked a few steps before he turned around again. "Oh, so you've got jokes now." He says, but there's playfulness in his voice. I grin sarcastically at him. He sighs. "Look, I'm so-"

"I can't look. I'm blind." I tease. He growls in frustration.

"I'm sorry. I'm not going to help you, because I don't want you... running off and doing something stupid. Like get yourself killed, or lose hearing, or get injured beyond repair." He mumbles, a slight crack in his voice.

I cross my arms over my chest. "Kiba... why... why are you so concerned? I'm pretty sure just a few months ago, you would've been fine with it."

"A few months ago, you weren't blind. I had never seen you that hurt. Ever. and I don't ever want to see you like that _again_. I just want you to be safe."

"Safe? Every time anyone leaves for a mission higher than maybe D rank, we're technically risking our lives. No one is ever safe out there. And we choose that. We want to make this world a safer place, we need to work for it." I counter.

"But-"

"No buts, you know it's true." I snap. He's silent for a moment.

"You're not going to take no for an answer, are you." He sighed in defeat. 

"I can be stubborn if I so wish to be." I smirk.

"Fine then. When do we begin?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm trying to make up for all the time I spent not making any new works, so I wanted to make this good. Even if it is summer, I'm stuck where probably every middle schooler finds themselves; confused. Life is confusing, everyone knows that (if you think it's easy, you're not even trying to live). Next chapter will come soon, I promise you.


	3. What Two Can Accomplish

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shikamaru has completely dropped his laziness and works together with Kiba to control and use his senses like an Inuzuka.

Here we are, an open area, that Kiba explains to me is a field. He tells me to sit down beside him, and we will begin.

"First thing you want to learn to do," Kiba begins. "Is shut out every thought in your mind. Your mind needs to become entirely blank."

I nod, and close my eyes (though it has no different affect), and focus entirely on my breathing. I focus on breathing in through my nose, and out through my mouth. I do that at least four times before my entire mind is as dark as my non existent eyesight.

"Second thing you need to do, is let your senses go. Listen for every bird chirp, until you can hear the grass itself rustle in the breeze." Kiba instructed.

Then we were in silence. I did as I was told, and pricked my ears, listening for the birds to begin their chirping. At first, it was annoying. It was chirp this chirp that, giving me a bit of a headache.

Still, I force myself to listen, until finally, I pick up on their pattern, and it suddenly became a song. A song Mother Nature herself orchestrated. The breeze through the leaves had begun percussion, making the song have more. 

My ears picked up the small thunking of a woodpecker pecking through the wood of a tree, blending into the song in a rhythm humans could never replicate. It flooded into the dark, blankness of my mind, repeating and adding more with each passing second.

And just barely, I caught the swift whistle of the wind weaving its way through the maze of blades. The concert gave me an entirely new point of view on the world, and though I couldn't see it, I could still tell it was beautiful.

We lasted in silence for a long time, the concert never ending. I listened to how the wind rustled each blade of grass, and I began to count. It would take a while, I knew, but we were going to be here all day, so...

I was already reaching around fifty when a strong gust of wind blew across the grass, and I had to start over. I counted quicker, focusing on each individual blade of grass, and how they swayed, but never broke.

My hobby had always been watching clouds, but now that I couldn't see them, perhaps I'd have to settle for counting individual blades of grass, which seemed boring, but made time fly by quick.

I heard Kiba shift. "Well, first phase, I would believe is complete."

"Indeed so." I agree.

"The next phase of hearing, is hearing every individual thing around you-"

"There are two hundred fifty-three trillion, seven hundred eighty-six billion, four hundred sixty-two million, eight hundred thirty-seven thousand, two hundred twenty-nine blades of grass in this field." I interrupt him. Kiba pauses for a moment.

"What the- how? You're not an Inuzuka... so how did you learn so quickly?" Kiba sputtered.

"I listen, pay attention, and observe. Only when I want to, however." I explained.

"Well then. Um. Onto phase three." Kiba said, still shocked. "Hearing range. You can hear well in this general area, but, how far can you hear, and how well?"

I take a deep breath, and begin to focus. I hear Kiba take out a piece of paper or something, and begin to write something. I push that out, and begin listening. At first, I can hear the concert once again, until I can hear the whistle of the wind through the grass. I strain to listen beyond, into the trees. I can hear the rustling of the leaves, and even the pawsteps of some type of mammal. Probably a rabbit, from the hopping.

Straining my ears, I try to listen into the village. I hear the distant sound of footsteps and chatter. I can't tell what anyone is saying, but I catch some words here and there. 

"What can you hear?" Kiba asked softly.

For a moment, I don't answer. "People. I can hear them moving, and talking, but I can't understand what they're saying. I can hear a rabbit moving through the forest, and the leaves of the trees. That's as far as I can hear."

"Good. Then we're getting somewhere, and fast." Kiba approved. Akamaru barked happily. I sighed, knowing I had a long ways to go. I could hear the beginning of crickets chirping.

"How late in the day is it?" I ask tiredly.

"It's getting dark, so I suppose it's time to call it a day." I felt Kiba's hand slip into mine. "Come on, I'll take you home." Though I could not see his face, I sensed he was grinning. I let myself smile a bit in return.

"If you insist." I sigh, pulling myself to my feet. Kiba's grip on my hand is firm, yet gentle. His hand felt cold. "Are you alright?" He tenses beside me.

"Yeah! Yeah, I'm fine! Why do you ask?" He says too quickly. I frown again, but don't say anything else. He was shivering a bit... or was he... trembling? I give his hand a reassuring squeeze, and he relaxes.

We walk together, him guiding me, making sure I didn't trip over anything. It's funny, now that I think about it. Kiba's usually so... air-headed, quick tempered, and energetic. So why was he being so out of character? Why was he so caring, and gentle? Did he think I was weak, or frail? I make a dismissive 'tch' sound, and am suddenly angry with Kiba.

"Hm? What's up?" He asks, sounding concerned. I hate that.

"Nothing." I say sharply, then clear my throat. I hadn't meant to snap at him. My face feels hot from embarrassment. 

The rest of the walk is in silence, though Kiba had unfortunately released my hand. I felt that it'd be weird to ask him to take my hand again, so I pretended not to care. It made me feel anxious, though. And alone. I didn't like it one bit.

I must've been scowling, because Kiba halts and puts a hand on my shoulder. "Is something wrong? You look rather mad. And paler than usual. Also, a bit red in the face." I lower my head a bit and keep scowling.

"It's not a big deal." I whisper. "I just need some time alone at home."

His aura suddenly feels a bit stung. "O-of course." his voice cracks at the end, but he covers it with a cough. A wave of guilt crashes over me, and I decide that I need to get away from Kiba as soon as possible. "We're, um, here." He says quietly.

Relief floods my senses, and I thank him for walking me home. I start to walk forward, and he catches me by the wrist. I flinch, startled. "Need something?"

He takes his hand away quickly and apologizes a few times, then clears his throat. "I, ah, was wondering what time tomorrow you wanted to continue training." He says sheepishly. Kiba sounded nervous, as though he was unsure if what he was saying was okay or not.

I pause for a moment. "Anytime is fine." I say finally. "Just come by and I'll be there... as I've nowhere else I _can_ go..." I add bitterly.

Kiba puts a hand on my shoulder. "That'll change before you know it! I'm sure Lady Tsunade will come up with _something_." He assures me. I nod, then pause, and frown deeply at him.

"What do you mean? How did you know we were planning on having my eyesight fixed?" I ask coldly. He makes a small whine of discomfort.

"I-I just pieced it together-"

"Come on Kiba. You know you aren't smart enough to figure that out." I say harshly. I stop, processing what I just said. "I mean-"

"No, you're right. I have a one-track mind, so... yeah..." He says. "I, er, might have been eavesdropping, and you walked right by me..." I suddenly feel embarrassed that I didn't notice him. I scowl a bit, and suddenly remember I have no idea which direction my house is in. "A-anyway, here, let me help you." Kiba puts a hand on my shoulder, and I flinch again.

He guides me to the door, and taps on it. I hear the creak as it opens. "Oh. Hello, Kiba. Hey, son." I recognize the voice as my father. "I was wondering where you'd run off to. I thought you might've been watching clouds-"

"I _can't_ watch clouds, dad." I interrupt bitterly. He pauses for a moment.

"What do you mean? It wasn't exactly all blue sky today." He points out.

"I wouldn't know that either, dad." I say. "How were you not informed of this?"

"Because... it's not worth noting?" He guesses. "I don't know, how would I know any of this?"

"The question is, how do you _not_ know? I'd have thought you'd be one of the first people they told." I sigh.

"What...?"

"I'm blind, dad."

I wish I could've seen the shock on his face.


	4. All For Naught

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shikamaru and Kiba had been training together for weeks now, and Kiba was sure Shikamaru was ready to go back to his ninja duties. However, when they went to speak to the Hokage... they receive news Shikamaru never should've heard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, yes, I know. I've neglected this for a bit. I'm sorry. Here ya go.

"Alright then, exactly where is Akamaru, and what is he doing?" Kiba quizzed. It had been weeks since we had begun; in fact, it had been about a month. I had been growing impatient, worrying if Ino was still alive or not.

"He's at the entrance, chasing Izumo around in circles... and trying to pee on him? What the- why?!" I exclaimed. Kiba burst out laughing. 

"Y'know, I think we can go tell Lady Tsunade of your progress. I think you might be ready to go back to your ninja duties!" He complimented. I grinned. I had awaited this day for a long time, and it was finally here. I didn't have to see to sense that Kiba was grinning with me. "Come on, let's go and show her. Think you can manage without me guiding you?" He teased. I laughed. I had never felt more comfortable near anyone before.

"Won't know until we try." I shrug, and stand. We had spent each week working on my individual other senses. And now, it was as if I could see, but not like most other humans.

"Race you." Kiba teased, then took off running.

"Oh, you're on!" I chase after him, through the vibrations in the ground. I could picture him ahead of me, running full speed. Immediately, other people hit my senses, and I swiftly dodge between them after Kiba.

We run for a while, me chasing after his scent, him running ahead. I couldn't remember the last time I'd had this much fun. It reminded me of when I was a carefree kid, doing whatever the heck I wanted, living by my _own_ rules. That was how I had first gotten to really know Kiba. Me, him, Naruto, and Chouji had been the four to always escape a lecture from Iruka-sensei. And look at us now; not one thing changing.

I'm savoring the moment, when I sense Kiba stop a few yards ahead of me. I skid to a stop next to him. Another scent hits my nose. A person was standing in front of us. I hadn't memorized peoples' scents yet, other than Kiba's and my parents', so I was unfamiliar with it at first.

"Hey, Kiba, Shikamaru!" I recognized the voice immediately as Naruto's.

"Hello, Naruto." I respond. I sniff the air for a moment, and mentally label that scent as Naruto's.

"Whoa, how'd you know it was me?" Naruto asked, sounding startled and amazed.

"Your voice." I stated simply.

"Isn't it great?" Kiba said proudly, excitement bubbling in his voice. "He's back on his feet, and ready to go back to his ninja duties, I bet!"

"You sound more excited about this than _I_ am, Kiba." I point out.

"Wait, but he's... still blind, right?" Naruto asked.

I frown, then point at Kiba. "Why do you think I've been training with specifically _him_ for the past month?" Naruto gives an 'ohh', and we part ways, Kiba reminding me about Tsunade.

So we walk together, and talk a bit. 

"Do you really think she'll let me back on the team? Chouji is all alone..." I sigh.

"I honestly can't say I know. I don't. I really don't. It's hard to predict what she'll say. She's a confusing person." Kiba replies. I swallow hard, nervousness beginning to crack through my rock-solid wall of no emotion. While I was learning to control my senses, I also learned to contain my emotions. I forced the nervousness back down and sealed the crack.

"No going back now." I breath as we step through the door. I pause for a moment to let my senses spread through the building. The entire layout was revealed to me like a map through my feet.

"Well, if you wanted to-"

"No, Kiba. I need to do this. This is my choice." I assure him. Mostly, though, I'm assuring myself. No one is forcing me to do this, so there was no need to be nervous. I was to remain emotionless.

We walked up the stairs carefully, and began walking down the hall. As we grew closer to the room, my stomach churned, and I felt a bit nauseous. There certainly _was_ no going back now.

"Last chance to turn back, if you're nervous." Kiba offered.

"No." I say immediately. "Come on." I tap on the door. There's silence. Then,

"Enter."

I open the door and enter the room, along with Kiba. My senses quickly adjust to the room, and I smell two scents. One in the back center of the room, behind the desk I know is there, and one to the left of it (from their point of view).

"Shikamaru. I'm surprised to see you here. No, I'm afraid I haven't found any ways to cure your eyesight." Tsunade sighs, her voice dripping with regret.

"I don't need my eyesight." I respond, to which I hear her shift in her chair. "For the past month, I've trained with Kiba here," I indicate to where he is. "and learned to use my enhanced senses to see without my eyes."

"Have you now?" She growls. I didn't know why she was so upset. "Well then, I have some good news... and a bit of... bad news. Which would you rather hear first."

"If it's the good news, tell us the good news first. If it's the bad news, tell us the good news first, and the good news second." Kiba jokes.

"But... that's only good news." I point out.

"Oh, good! Tell us the good news, then." I almost laugh, but bite my tongue. I don't need to see to sense Tsunade's glare.

"Kiba, why are you even here?" She asks coldly.

"Companionship?" Kiba offered. I hear Tsunade sigh in frustration.

"The good news is that I suppose... since you got here without much guidance... you can go back to missions..." She sighs, her voice cracking at the end. "Shikamaru... the bad news, I'm afraid... is that we found Ino... dead."

I stop smiling for a moment as what she said sunk in.

"She had a note in her hand... reading 'Shikamaru. It's not your fault.'"

I barely hear her. My mind begins to go blank. Hot tears begin poking at the corners of my eyes, threatening to fall. I nod slowly, then excuse myself quickly. I stand outside the room, joined shortly by Kiba.

The tears fall, but I'm smiling from the shock. My eyes are wide, and I can't force them shut. I must look on the brink of insanity. I knew I felt like it.

"She's... dead. Because I couldn't save her. Because I'm weak." I whispered to myself. "I couldn't save Asuma. I couldn't save Ino. Who's next? Chouji?"

"Shika stop it." Kiba commands, his voice shaking. "It's not your fault. Ino said herself." He embraces me, but I'm frozen stiff, unable to move, the shock still sinking in. "Please... I can't bear to see you this way..."

I could see Ino's lifeless body in my mind, finally snapping the psychotic grin on my face to the trembling frown it now was. I embraced Kiba back and sobbed furiously into what I knew was his shoulder. The sobs wracked my entire body, just as they had when I was alone that day Asuma had died. Like that day I'd nearly gotten my entire team killed. Why couldn't the gods just take me? End my suffering instead of toying with it.

My thoughts immediately went to Chouji. He was going through what I was, wasn't he? If I died, how would that affect him?

_Greatly_. I thought to myself. _If I die, he'll never risk the potential bad luck I'd give him.__ So would Kiba. Though they wouldn't think so, I'd be sparing them._

"We'll get through this, Shika. I promise." Kiba choked. My nose twitched, and I sense someone else coming. I'm too upset to even try to stop crying.

What am I going to do?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Huge Ino fans out there... I'm sorry.


	5. The Final Chapter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Many days later, Kiba receives news that Tsunade has found a way to give Shikamaru his sight back, and goes to tell Shikamaru. 
> 
> He's just in time to save him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Final Chapter guys! I know, some of you maybe have been waiting, I don't know, so yeah. Here we go.

Finally. Today was the day. I stood at the edge of the cliff staring out, even though I couldn't see.

It's a three hundred meter drop; I had researched ahead of time; so if I'm my calculations are correct, I should be able to fall back and my spine will break instantly. This is my last time to contemplate this. I try, but I can only think of going. It's a pathetic, cowardly way to go, but I don't care. I'm done.

A take a step forward, and take one last glance over my shoulder, just to sniff the air. I'm alone, only about two miles from the meadow Kiba taught me about my senses in. I can't cry, I don't want to go out that way. I want to go out because I want to. Because I need to.

I think of Chouji, how he'll be left all alone. I think of Ino, who is dead because of me. I think of Asuma, who I couldn't save. I think of Kiba, whose time on me was wasted, and it's all, everything, entirely my fault.

I feel the rim of the cliff with my foot, and step to the very edge. I'm ready to go. I'm ready to see Asuma again. I'm ready to see Ino again. 

I take my final step over the edge, and I fall. I let myself fall loosely, forcing myself not to spin around and land on my feet. I'm falling, and can only feel the wind. My senses are beginning to falter, and now it's time. My end is near. And I'm welcoming it with open arms.

Though I'm falling, my mind is racing, shouting at me to save myself, that I'm wrong.

But I know that I'm right. I chose this, and I refuse to go back. 

My body feels nothing; I'm numb from all the air time. Still, the thought remains. I know this is what I <strike>want</strike> need to do, so why do I regret it already? Why am I shouting at myself? I'm at war with myself, but I refuse to let up. 

I'm falling. I know. Everything is starting to fade away; the screams in my mind, my senses, everything.

My senses tell me faintly that I'm approaching the ground.

Just as I'm about to hit the ground, my body jolts as something knocks me aside.

I'm on the ground pain roaring through me, as I still took most of the damage from the fall. But as my consciousness fades, one scent hits my nose as subtly as a leaf hitting the ground.

Kiba.

~

I see a bright white light. It's blinding; the first thing I'd seen since that lightning storm. I can't move; I'm just standing there. My first instinct is to cry out, but I can't speak either.

A figure comes into view, only the silhouette at first. And then it clears. Before me, stands Asuma. He puts a hand on my shoulder.

"Why are you here?" He says. I blink at him, confused. "Shikamaru, I know you too well to think you died on the battlefield, or of any sickness. Why are you here?" I don't answer for a moment.

"I commit suicide." I mutter. Asuma puts his forehead against mine, and closes his eyes. We stay like that, and I lower my gaze to my feet.

"Why would you do that? What happened?" Asuma croaks, his voice hoarse.

"It's because I died, isn't it." I turn my head to see Ino walking towards me. She reaches me, and Asuma pulls back. "It's not your fault, Shikamaru. Didn't my last words reach you?"

"They did, but that doesn't change the fact that I left you." I growl. "I couldn't save either of you. What good am I?"

"You couldn't have saved us!" They both shouted at the same time.

"Shikamaru, you are still alive. You are not quite dead, thanks to Kiba." Asuma sighed. "Hang onto that lifeline. Please. If not for me, and not for Ino, do it for the team. Chouji needs you. And though Kiba's not part of the team, he desperately cares for you too. I know you care for him as well. I've been watching over you."

"Please don't give up yet, Shikamaru." Ino insisted. "It's not your time."

They begin to fade and I cry out for them to wait. But they're gone. The white room begins to fade to dark, but not pitch black.

_What_...? I start to sit up, but I can't. My eyes adjust, and I see the moon through the curtains. I'm in a hospital room. I scan the room, and see someone in the corner of the room, slumped over and asleep.

If his scent wasn't enough, the red marks on his cheeks were clear enough.

Kiba was sound asleep, and was snoring softly. I look down at myself for the first time. I have a few more scars than before I lost my sight. I can see. I can only guess that Tsunade found a way to return it.

My eyes hurt like I was being blinded, but it was only a side affect from regaining my sight, I knew. My senses weren't dampened at all. I could feel the whole hospital, I could hear and smell just the same. Maybe Kiba's time hadn't been wasted.

Kiba was who saved me from certain death. The certain death I chose. But life hates me, so it sent Kiba to 'save' me. 

I'm still numb, but I _can_ feel hot tears trickling down my cheeks. I blink a few times, then force myself to sit up. My movements seem to stir Kiba. He lifts his head to see me staring at him, my tears the only kind of emotion showing before my shield falters and I begin to cry.

Kiba starts to cry too, I sense. He stands, and walks over to me. His arms wrap around me, an I lean into him, his scent washing over me. "You little shit, what were you thinking!?" He scolds me, but I hear his sorrow. "If I hadn't been there, you would've died! Then where would I be?! I need you, Shika! You can't just throw away your life like that!"

"I don't want to live. You should've let me die-"

"Shut up! I'll never let you die! Haven't you realized that!? You're important to me! I can't just let you give up!" Kiba hissed into my shoulder. "If you don't have a will to live, let _me_ be your will to live!"

"Kiba, I can't ask that of you. What happens if you die because of me too? Then what? Then life will be lonely. Life will be torture." I protest.

"I will live as long as you do! That's a promise." Kiba sniffed. "Just promise _me_ that you'll stay alive too."

I didn't reply for a moment. I cried into Kiba's shoulder, not just of sorrow, but of relief. Relief that someone else would care for me. Relief that I wasn't alone. "Fine." I say once I steady my voice. "If you're really going to be that troublesome..."

"Shikamaru..." Kiba muttered. "I love you, you know that, right?"

"I figured it out from this." I sigh, letting a smile slide onto my face. "It's great to see you again."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's really short, but there wasn't much left to say. So... sorry to disappoint.


End file.
